15 Jokes Grandkids Can Actually Remember and Tell

There is nothing quite like the moment a grandchild decides to tell you a joke. The big buildup, the squirming excitement, the slightly garbled punchline and then the two of you laughing together regardless of how it came out.

If you want to send the grandkids armed with something they can actually pull off, this list is a good place to start. These are “what’s the difference between” jokes, by Parade, a format that works especially well for young tellers. The setup is the same every time, which gives little ones a reliable script to hold onto.

No tricky references. No punchlines that need three explanations. Just a clear picture, a familiar word and just enough silliness to make the ending feel surprising.

Jokes for the Youngest Grandkids (Ages 4 and 5)

These five are the most straightforward. The objects are easy to picture, and each punchline follows a simple contrast. Share them with the grandkids and let them practice with a little physical flair: a hand drifting like a cloud, an exaggerated bark, a backpack tugged dramatically toward the floor.

• What’s the difference between a cloud and a pillow? One floats in the sky, and the other helps your head float into dreamland.
• What’s the difference between a dog and a tree? One has a bark you can hear, and the other has bark you can touch.
• What’s the difference between a teacher and a train? One says, “Spit out your gum!” and the other says, “Choo-choo!”
• What’s the difference between a school bus and a cold? One takes you to school, and the other makes you stay home.
• What’s the difference between a bicycle and a flower? One has pedals, and the other has petals.

Jokes That Add a Little Wordplay (Great for Ages 5 and Up)

These introduce gentle puns while keeping the pictures easy to imagine. A duck, a clock, a dentist, a spider and a fish, all things a child can picture right away.

One tip worth passing along to the grandkids: the fish-and-guitar joke deserves a slightly slower finish. “Tune” and “tuna” sound just alike. A little pause before the last two words gives the listener that satisfying moment of recognition.

• What’s the difference between a duck and a comedian? One quacks jokes, and the other cracks jokes.
• What’s the difference between a clock and an elephant? One has hands, and the other has feet.
• What’s the difference between a dentist and a magician? One pulls teeth, and the other pulls rabbits out of hats.
• What’s the difference between a spider and a computer? One spins a web, and the other surfs one.
• What’s the difference between a fish and a guitar? You can tune a guitar, but you can’t tuna fish.

For the Older Grandkids (Ages 6 to 8)

These five ask the listener to connect two meanings or notice an unexpected comparison. Still everyday subjects like shoes, cookies, sandwiches, but with a little more to chew on. The vacuum-and-dog joke is a reliable crowd-pleaser. The sandwich-and-secret one is even better delivered with a dramatic whisper on the punchline.

• What’s the difference between a vacuum and a dog? One sucks up crumbs, and the other begs for them.
• What’s the difference between a cookie and a computer? One has chocolate chips, and the other has computer chips.
• What’s the difference between a shoe and a joke? One has a sole, and the other has a punchline.
• What’s the difference between a well-dressed person on a bicycle and a poorly dressed person on a tricycle? Attire!
• What’s the difference between a sandwich and a secret? One gets spread around, and the other is supposed to stay quiet.